We no longer serve porkless bacon after our entire supply mysteriously imploded.
New! Hot Garden Salad contains no raw vegetables
We toss boiled tomato wedges, fried celery, baked radishes, stir-fried green onions, sautéed bell peppers, freshly baked croutons and peeled roasted chestnuts over a bed of steamed lettuce. Served with melted blue cheese dressing.
New! Plate of "Raw" Brownies
Here's a decadent dessert for the discriminating macrobotic foodie. Our "raw" brownies are the same fig paste you know so well but this time we shaped it to look like square brownies. It'll make you wonder why the quotation marks are around the word raw and not brownies.
New! Kosher Meal
It's poached salmon served with long-grain rice. It's surprisingly tasty, but don't tell anyone, because then everybody will order it.
New! Kosher-Style Meal
It's the Kosher Meal served when the restaurant rabbi has the day off. Only available Friday night and Saturday morning.
New! Wheat-Free Gluten-Free Sugar-Free Yeast-Free Pancakes
Our subcontractors sold us substandard flapjack batter lacking in ingredients. We were about to throw it away when someone in Marketing said, "Hey, you know, there's some people allergic to everything who would pay extra to eat this swill." We promoted that guy.
by Mike Spiegelman
1 comment:
Can I get the raw brownies well done?
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