All recipes have been tasted by staff or Boomer the Test Dog.
Serving portions suggested for Americans.
Dry ingredients are measured by weight, liquids measured by volume, and smoke measured by plumes.
Garnishes are for entertainment purposes only. Do not eat garnishes.
Whenever possible, add salt or caramel.
If recipe fails, dose meal with Tabasco sauce. If dessert fails, pour caramel on it.
Stop saying the words "flavor" and "flavortown." Restrain from yelling "BAM!"
Stocks and broths do not constitute a meal unless something is cooked in it first.
Substitute condensed milk for whole milk when baking. Survivalists can use evaporated milk.
It is not federal law to "kiss the cook."
by Mike Spiegelman
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